Oh yeah. That's right. Gramps, you ain't got nothin' on this punk. 11.5km, uphill (both directions, seriously), IN. THE. SNOW.

Yup. I biked to work. And then back home. I hate not having a car. Perhaps it's time to start looking for a house that's considerably closer to my place of employment. But, now nobody can complain about me sitting on my derrière all day, because hey! I walked 23km today.

Pretty soon, I should be winning the Boston Marathon.

What if Death were sentient? What if there actually was a grim reaper, harvester of souls? Personally, I would hate to have that job. First off, 'cause of all the whining, blubbering fools who really don't want to die, but have to 'cause their number's been called - which brings me to another thought: what if God and Satan were locked in a game of Celestial Bingo, and every time a number was called, the soul with that number on it was harvested? It would make the term "your number's up" more feasible. And then whomever called "Bingo" first got to keep all the souls currently inked on the bingo cards.

But, I digress. Harvesting whiny people would be annoying, because not only do you have to kill them, you have to escort their still-whining (and probably still-sobbing and terrified) soul to either heaven or hell. The bigger problem, however, is those who would not go gently into that good night. Guys like Chuck Norris. Sure, as the Reaper, it's the job to kill, but some people tend to be a little more tenacious in their hold on life than others. I can't imagine the robe being conducive to fast-flowing hand-to-hand combat, although it would be quite easy to conceal both body armour and heavy weaponry underneath it. And a scythe, while awesome, is no match for the chainsaw rifle that Marcus Fenix would surely be wielding when God finally dabs his number.

Some tragedy is so great that even death stays away I've heard it said. What if that were the case? What if one were to endure so much trauma at one time that the Harvester of Souls were to take pity on that person and choose to stay his blade? Or maybe both God and Satan were smart, and knew that to end that one's life now would mean an eternity of un-sated vengeance. That would be hell to put up with, for sure.

If the reaper were real, it would explain a lot about death, and near-death. If the reaper were a woman, it would explain even more, like Darwin Awards, and other stupid male deaths. Especially the sadistic ones.